[ Muffled Rhythmic Pounding ]
[ Pounding Resumes ]
[ Fades ]
[ Pounding Resumes ]
[ Water Gurgling ]
[ Water Rushing ]
Edited by Scooby
[ Roaring, Squealing ]
[ Indicators Beep ]
- How we doin' out there, Leila? - Fuck you!
How we doin, my ass. I'm totally soaked out here.
Aw, come on now, I pay you two bucks a day, don't I?
Get off your lazy ass and come and help me!
Cut me some slack, will ya?
I'm workin' hard too, you know.
Now what?
Son of a bitch. Pantucci.
Ow. Shit man.
[ in Headset ] I'm flyin' blind up here, Brainiac. I thought you fixed the radar.
It's a little temperamental. You have to be gentle.
Gentle my ass. The whole system just cracked out on me.
- Killed off by your negative vibes, no doubt. - No doubt.
Are you hitting that thing again?
No.
[ mutters in Korean language ]
You know, where is it written that I have to go out there and work?
I mean, you know, Finnegan, why don't you get your ass out there sometime?
I love you too, Leila.
- Everything all right? - Just peachy.
[ Man ] We are on schedule, are we not?
- [ Finnegan ] You didn't hire me for my social graces. - [ Hanover ] That's right.
We hired you for your reputation. You better live up to it.
- Where are we? - Right there. Middle of nowhere.
- And our final destination? - Right...
there. Middle of nowhere squared.
Finnegan.
Yeah, I heard of you. But I thought you'd be older.
Like a fine wine, I'm ageing gracefully. Thank you.
Like a fine wine, my ass. You look more like a keg of beer to me.
[ Laughs ]
Any questions, Mr Finnegan?
Nope. I get paid to shut up and do my job.
So I shut up and do my job.
You're not the least bit curious as to where we're going?
Like the sign says, "If the cash is there, we do not care."
Very good.
[ Door Closes ] Where the hell are we goin'?
[ Loud Dance Band ]
# Everyone drops what they're doin' #
# When Lady Luck walks into the room #
# I'm so broke that it's a shame # [ Gamblers chattering ]
# Lady Luck don't even know my name #
# Bartender, pour a double #
# When Lady Luck walks into the room #
[ Yelling ]
Ladies and gentlemen. Mesdames et messieurs's.
If I could have your attention for just one moment, please.
On behalf of myself, Captain Atherton and his crew...
welcome to the maiden voyage of the Argonautica!
[ cheering ]
Each and every one of the hundreds of men and women
in service upon this vessel,
has but one objective:
To make your dreams come true.
As for myself, my entire life... I have had but, one dream.
To create the greatest most luxurious, most expensive, pleasure ship ever built.
And tonight, seeing all of you here...
so beautiful, so elegant,
so rich. [ laughing ]
I realize that my dream has come true,
and I thank all of you from the bottom of my heart for making it so.
To the Argonautica! Good times forever!
[ All Shouting ] Forever!
[ Percussion Resumes ]
[ Passengers Laughing, chattering ]
This ship is so smooth we can't believe it!
[ Captain ] She's state-of-the-art. Not another ship like her, ma'am.
She can hit a 40-foot swell and not even put a ripple across your Martini.
It's been very nice meeting you people. I hope you enjoy the rest of the cruise.
Thank you, so much.
- Oh, excuse me. - [in French] No, no. Excusez-moi capitaine.
Really very sorry.
[in French] Au revoir
[ Thunder ]
[ Scoffs ] Nice picture.
[ Distant Wailing ]
[ Australian Accent ] I hate this bloody water stuff.
- That reminds me, I'm hungry. - You're always hungry.
Yeah. So? I'm a growing boy, you know.
- You're still growing? - You got a problem with that?
- Be happy I don't eat you. - So what you realizing, Mamooli?
Uh, well, that my goal in life before I die...
is to make love to a woman from every country on Earth.
Like, countries acknowledged by the U.N.? Or like, made-up countries too?
- What the hell does that mean? - Like T. Ray's country.
Shut your face, Billy. Australia's a country.
- Australia's an island. - Well, technically, it's a continent.
Ah, shit, man. Island, country, continent. If there's women there,
well, I'm interested.
You come to my country, I'll shoot your ass.
Does he ever talk about anything else but women?
Nah, not that I recall. The only way to shut him up is to shoot him.
- Yeah, that's right. - Yeah?
- [ Gun cocking ] You ever thought about it? - [ Man ] Every day.
- [ Knife Unsheathing ] Oh, ooh, ooh. - [ Man ] Come on, boys.
- Sit down, right? - Oh, ooh. [ chuckling ]
Go back to Australia.
- [ Belches ] - You know what I want to eat?
I'll take a couple of nice, greasy pig's feet,
some pickled monkey brains and one of them big elephant eyeballs,
so they pop when you bite in to them.
- [ Men Laugh ] - [ Blowing Smoke ]
Yummy. [ chuckles ] [ Vomiting ]
[ Men Laughing ] You like that?
- Oh, man, that's disgusting. - T. Ray, you stinking up the place.
Shut up.
Hey, knock it off. You're not getting paid to party.
[ Finnegan in Headset ] Pantucci! Pantucci!
You're not where I think you are, are ya?
Hola.
Listen, this radar's still funky. I can feel it, and it's a very bad feeling.
You know how many uncharted islands are out here?
- I know, two. - Oh, that's very funny.
Wait till I crash this rig into some god-damned no name island.
What is this, a talk show? I need some quiet time.
Over and out.
Whoa. Nasty.
[ Hydraulic Lift Hissing ] Whoa.
Hit you.
Holy, shit.
"Holy, shit."
- I'm feelin' a real lack of love here. - Get in there!
- [ Billy ] Ow. - Well, what do we have here, fellas?
I found him snooping around the cargo.
If there's anything I can do to make your trip more comfortable, you come to me.
- Okay? - G'day, mate. [ Men Shouting, Pantucci Grunting And Groaning ]
[ Fighting Sounds in Headset ]
Well, don't just sit there! Go help him!
Are you kidding me? Those guys are dangerous.
- No shit. You've got to do something. - I find you live longer if you don't.
Finnegan!
[ Punches Landing, Men Laughing ]
[ Pantucci Moaning, Panting ]
We got a contract,
twenty hours out and back.
You beat my engine man to death, it's gonna take a hell of a lot longer.
Which is okay by me, since overtime will run you double rate.
He was nosin' around in my cargo.
Okay, so he's nosey.
Contract was, no questions asked.
Yow, fellas, I vote
we kick this little piece of shit overboard.
[ Grunts ] Well, I vote we kill him.
I vote we kill him. then we throw him overboard
Well, we don't vote here. See, it's not a democracy.
Okay. I'll say it one more time for the hearing impaired.
[ Billy Grunts ] [ Guns cocking ]
[ Knife Unsheathing ]
This could be messy.
Vivo.
Everybody okay?
Anybody gonna shoot anybody?
You know. You boys need to get out more often.
That's a year off my life.
[ Thunder, Lightning Crashing ]
[Computer voice] Please enter your security key card.
[Computer voice] Good evening, Captain Atherton.
- Good evening to you. - The vault is now open.
Choices, choices, choices.
Oh, you're a big, bad boy, aren't ya?
Hmm... You're more my size.
[ clearing throat ] Good evening, mademoiselle.
Hello.
Red-handed. My God, what a cheeky little trollop you are.
Good evening gentlemen, I was just on my way out.
- Or maybe not. - A good decision.
There's no place to run. The nearest land is... what is it about, 600 miles, captain?
- Nearer 800, sir. - According to this fax we received...
- Oh, that's not a very flattering photograph, is it? - Let me see.
You're wanted for burglary, robbery, forgery.
Ohh... and attempted murder.
My ex-boyfriend. [Canton laughs] What?
6 arrests, 5 convictions and wanted in 4 countries.
How does a beautiful woman as young as yourself a mass such an incredible record?
Trust me, it wasn't easy.
I think it's because you're not very good at what you do.
Hey, steady on, Canton. No need for that.
Uh-uh! I believe that's my card.
- Thank you. - Captain, do we have a brig on this ship?
Yes, we do, sir. But it's not finished yet.
- You can't put a lady in the brig! - True.
But you, mademoiselle, are no lady.
Hey, watch it!
[ Sighs ]
Hmm. And you, Mr Canton, are no gentleman.
[ Pantucci moans ]
They must be 30 feet long, man.
They're not nukes or nothing, but the bang sure would make your butt pucker.
You ever pull that shit again, I'll kill you myself.
Hold still, you big dummy.
I'm sorry. It stings! Hey, do you think we could pull over?
You got anything to numb the pain.
Aw, yes, my little love bug, But just a little.
- I think I need a higher dosage. - You always need a higher dosage.
- Hey, Tucci. How many of those things are there? - Huh?
I don't know. At least 8 or 9 of 'em. Enough to sink a damn aircraft carrier.
This is just great. Now I got bombs in my basement.
You know, maybe it's just me, but if you'd ask a question or two before accepting a job...
[ Pantucci ] If the cash is there, we do not care.
What kind of life philosophy is that, man?
Torpedoes. What the hell are they gonna do with torpedoes?
[ computer beeps ]
Yes!
[ Hanover ] Gentlemen. Say hello to the Chinese...
M1 - L1 triple-pulse assault rifle.
Rotating barrel, thousand-round capacity.
- Auto cooling, watertight. - Yeah!
Cheers, babe.
Mmm.
[ Electronic Whirring, Beeping ]
[ Beeping continues ]
[ Crew Members Chattering ] What?
[ Captain ] What's happening here, gentlemen?
Communications, what's your status?
All thermal and laser imaging generating a negative white screen response, sir.
- That's impossible. - Captain, radar not responding either, sir.
Right. Switch to auxiliary power, Mr Lewis.
Let's do a circuit check.
No response, sir. We have a complete mainframe meltdown.
- What about the communications gear. - Gone. All of it completely gone.
- Maybe it's the storm, sir. - No, no. That's nonsense.
- [Canton] This ship is impervious to weather. - [Captain] Can we still send?
Our signal goes all ecstatic, sir. I've never seen anything like it.
This equipment is state-of- the-art! Top of the line!
Mr Canton, please!
We are in a very dangerous situation here.
without radar or any form of imaging; we are sailing blind.
- No bloody way to communicate our situation. - I have something here, sir.
- What is it, Colin? - I don't know, sir,
But, whatever it is... it's big.
Probably just a pod of whales.
Moving at 31 knots, sir? I don't think so.
- Where's it coming from? - Directly beneath us, sir.
160 metres directly beneath us and rising very quickly.
150 metres. 140.
130. 120.
110. 100 metres.
Ninety, eighty.
- Seventy, sixty. - [Canton] What are they?
Fifty metres.
[ Crashing, screaming ]
[Woman] Oh my god.
[ Passengers Screaming ]
[ Man ] Open up! [ Woman sobbing ]
[ Metal Screeching, Ship Rumbling ]
[ Squishing Sound ]
[ woman screams ]
Hey! Who said you can put holes in my boat.
I didn't say you could put holes in my boat! That's gonna cost you extra you know!
- What the hell is that? - I don't know.
[ Man ] Let's go!
Looks like some kind of...
It's a torpedo launcher.
- I... I don't like this. - Yeah, I know. Neither do I.
- How much longer? - Another 22 minutes,
we'll be right on top of, uh,
whatever's out there. [ Radar Pinging ]
What the hell was that?
Hang on!
[ Explosion and screams ]
[ Alarm Beeping ] Joey! Joey, talk to me! Damage?
- Yeah. We got a hole on starboard bow. - Taking water?
A little, but it's Just above the water line.
I got no power coming from Jezebel. She's out cold.
[ Leila ] Something's wrong with Hercules. He's not getting any petrol.
That's it. I'm shutting her down.
Shit! What the hell did we hit?
Get it off the cases!
What the hell was that?
Whatever it was, it nearly took my bloody head off!
[ Laughing ] [ Mamooli ] What are you laughing at?
Cause we're alive you idiot.
A direct hit on any of these warheads and pfft! We'd be history, mate.
We got a hole in the starboard bow the size of Nebraska!
What's the status down here?
Old Jezebel got it right through the brain pan.
- [ Hanover ] What did we hit - [ Finnegan ] You got me.
[ Pantucci] - I think we killed the speed boat. - Speed boat.
We're hell and gone from the nearest land.
There's no way a speedboat gets out this far. No way.
Ow! Shit, man! Finnegan, nothing works! Hercules is shot to shit.
His gears are all mangled. His cylinder head seized up, I think.
We're leaking fuel fast. I'll give us 20 minutes,
half an hour tops, and then we're dead in the water.
Finnegan, you do something.
We have a job to finish, a schedule to maintain.
- Man, would you listen to this crap? - Shut up, grease monkey!
You're expendable! You know what I mean?
Yeah I know. Story of my life.
Hey, get your asses up here!
There's something out there.
- What? Let me see. Let me see it. - Could you just...
Whoa. It's a... It's a cruise ship.
Do you think she can spare us some fuel.
And a few minutes in her machine shop.
[ Together ] Absolutely.
[ Finnegan ] What the hell... [ Guns cocking ]
We'll take over from here.
You know, Hanover..
A ship like that, they got half a dozen different ways to call for help.
Not any more.
Pantucci. Can you fix this thing.
If I can get into the Love Boat's machine shop...
yeah, maybe I can fix this hunk of junk.
She ain't gonna run pretty, but she'll run.
[ Softly ] They've armed all the bombs, man. They're alive.
All right.
Finnegan and the grease monkey will come with us.
Wait a minute. The three of us stick together.
From now on, you'll be sticking with me.
- Billy! - Yeah, Chief.
Finish the torpedo launcher and watch the lady.
Aye, chief.
I'll watch her. I haven't done, Korean.
Hey, Mr Comedy, leave my girlfriend out of this.
- Get the fuck off me. - Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Behave yourself.
She'll eat you alive anyway.
Hey! Knock this shit off.
This is worse than high school.
Cruise ship's not movin'. Why ain't it movin'?
I don't know. All right, gentlemen.
- You know the drill. - Okay, let's move out!
[ Alarm Beeping ]
Bingo.
[ Finnegan ] Relax, Hanover. This is a cruise ship.
- You're not gonna need your guns. - What if they attack us, man?
With what? Margaritas and tanning oil.
This place is a mess.
You want me to call housekeeping?
[ Hanover ] Use any and all force necessary. The intimidation factor must be high.
There's a lot of passengers on this ship.
Yep. And half of them are packing lipstick.
Be careful you don't get glossed.
That was kind of fun.
Well, it was.
Everybody's in the atrium.
We'll pin 'em down there, then split up and finish the job. Sound off!
- We got the bow. - Level six.
- Casino. - Level three.
- Bridge! - Bow, top level.
- Here come the party crashers. - [ Pantucci ] I don't here any party
[ All Yelling ] Everybody down! Nobody move!
Shit.
Man. Looks like somebody had themselves one hell of a shindig.
We got blood here.
We got blood here too, mate.
We got blood everywhere.
[ Bell Dings, Machinery Whirs ]
[ Level Indicator Beeping ]
I got a really bad feelin' about this.
The doors are closing.
Where the hell is everybody?
Well, the lifeboats, they're all still here.
Where the hell is everybody?
Let's go!
[ Thunder Crashes ]
Shit. Hanover. Nobody home.
This place looks post evac, man. Total spooky town.
Looks like somebody beat you to the punch.
- Where the hell is everyone? - Who cares, mate? Let's hit the vault and go.
[ Fizzing ]
[ Rapid gunfire ]
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
Shh.
[ chuckles ] Fuck me, man.
[ Both Yell ] [ Gunfire Barrage Resumes ]
[ Hanover ] All right, knock it off!
I don't know what the hell's going on around here, but we've got a job to do.
- Machine shop. - Sub level nine.
T. Ray, Mamooli, take Finnegan and the grease monkey.
Take the freight elevators.
They're the only ones that go all the way to the bottom.
The rest of you come with me to the bridge.
- Lets move, now. - Come on.
[ Moans ]
[ Groaning Sound ]
What the hell was that?
[ Sighs ] Whatever.
[ Whispers ] Yes. Not bad.
Clear.
[ Soft Beeps, Static ]
The man did a good Job of shutting everything down.
Yeah. But he wasn't supposed to stop the ship.
- Or kill everybody on it. - I don't see any bodies.
It's like... It's like everyone just... vanished.
[ Metallic Rumble ]
Hey, is that you?
[ Water Moving, Gurgling ]
Turn up the pump, you idiot! We're sinking.
Relax, would ya. You're not the boss of me.
I'm the one supposed to be in charge around here.
[ Water Lapping, Gurgling ]
[ Soft Snorting Sound ]
[ Leila Screams ]
[ Gasping, Shrieking ]
[ Hanover in Headset ] - Billy, Billy, are you there? - What?
We've looked all around, there aren't any passengers.
What do you mean no passengers? How could there be no passengers?
- Have you seen anybody out there? - Nah. I haven't seen anybody.
Only an idiot would be out in this rain.
[ Screaming ]
The hulls on these ships are supposed to be impregnable.
[ Mamooli ] So what are you sayin'?
If the hull's impregnable, why are my feet wet?
It's a ghost ship. I vote we leave. Who votes we leave?
Shut up. Mate, that's it.
They thought they were sinking, so they abandoned ship.
Stupid bastards.
Oh, my God. He's right. You're right. Yeah.
They all jumped overboard. You know, I can just see the last,
asshole in saying. "Shit, yes, we forgot the lifeboats,
guess we're just gonna have to swim for it".
You got a real big mouth on you, you know that?
Yeah, I know that.
I don't like you.
You don't even know me.
Hey, check it out. It's my future ex-wives.
[ T. Ray ] Mamooli, you bloody pervert, get your mind out of the gutter.
- Come on, hurry it up. - Whoa, man! What stinks?
Did I say it was you.
[ Mamooli ] Man, this water's freezing!
[ Mamooli sings ]
[ Growling Sound Nearby ] Oh-ee, whoo. Mm-mmm.
Which one of you ladies wants to warm me up.
Hey, stay close.
- I didn't know you cared. - I care about your gun.
Mamooli, keep an eye on 'em.
Mmm.
What you got there?
- Peanut. - Peanut?
- Peanut. - Okay. Peanut.
[ Plop ] [ peanut falls in water ] Shit!
[ Soft Growl ]
[ Growl ]
Hey! [ Soft Growl ]
Who's in there?
[ Growls Continue ]
You come out now, or I'm gonna kick your ass.
[ Mamooli in Headset ] T. Ray, what the hell you doin', man?
[ Growling ]
[ Splashing ]
[ Growl ]
What is that?
[ T. Ray Screaming ]
T. Ray?
What did you do.
- Huh? - Hey! What did you do?
Don't shoot!
Well, what happened to T. Ray? What did you do to him?
We didn't do anything!
- Touch that, and you're dead. - Relax. It wasn't us.
[ Loud Growling, Wailing ]
[ Trillian ] What the hell happened here?
[ Beeps ]
- [ Computer voice ] Please enter your security key card. - [ Hanover ] Hey!
- Well, what do you know? Sign of life. - With curves.
Excuse me. But, this area is for authorised personnel only.
As the assistant to the purser, I'm afraid I'll have to report you.
- Where are the other passengers? - I don't know, sleeping.
You tell me what happened here, or I pull the trigger.
- Who are you? - Passenger. Just a passenger.
Name's Trillian. And you are?
[ Vivo ] Thank you. Makes my Job a lot easier.
- Glad to be of assistance. - So again, tell me what happened here.
- Where is everybody? - I thought you liked to blow things up.
[ Recording ] Good evening. The vault is now open. - [ Vivo ] I do.
Yes! Money, money, money.
[ Trillian Screaming ] [ Hanover ] Vivo!
Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Stop!
- [ Captain ] Jesus Christ! - [ Hanover ] Son of a bitch!
- No, no, no, no! - Come on!
Get outta here! Come on, get outta here!
[ Canton ] I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
You just killed one of my best men!
I didn't mean to. I-I-I thought it was one of them! I didn't know.
- Those are innocent people in there! - [ Hanover ] Shut up!
Who are you people?
- One of who? What are you talkin' about? - One of those things!
- Haven't you seen them? - [ Mamooli in Headset ]
What's that? Speak up, Mamooli!
- You're cutting out. Repeat that! - Yeah, yeah.
Shut up, man. Listen! I think T. Ray's dead.
Forget about that. We gotta get out of here. There's something down here.
Shut up!
Just shut... the fuck up!
There's nothin' down here but you and me. Hmm?
[ Growling, Splashing ]
Go on! Get the parts now! Get the parts! Come on!
[ Growling ]
What the...
Mamooli! T. Ray!
They're everywhere. You hear me? We've got to get off this ship.
Al right. Let's check it out.
- What about the vault? - It'll be here. Grab, Vivo's gun. Let's go!
What the hell was that, Finnegan?
I don't know! I didn't get a good look!
You get all the parts?
If I don't, I ain't goin' back to get 'em.
[ Growling, Wailing ]
[ Growling Increases ]
Go!
[ Pantucci screaming ]
[ Slams ]
Fifth level. Fourth level.
Third level. Second level.
[ Moans ] [ Alarm Rings ]
Second level. [ Growling, Metal Crashing ]
[ Crash ]
[ Elevator Dings ] First level.
- This corridor! Hey, hey, hey! - What are you doing?
- I'm not staying in here! - Trust me, lady, it ain't any better out there!
- I don't care! I'm outta here! - Will you relax!
- The door is closing. - Who the hell are you?
- I think she broke my nose.
Give me a chance, I'll break the rest of your face.
- Not that anyone would notice. - What is this about?
What is it?
That's what I've been trying to tell you.
There's something up there.
Third level. Fourth level. [ Squishing, Growling ]
Please stand clear of the door.
[ Elevator Dings ] Drop it! [ Weapons cocking ]
- Now! - Drop it! Drop it!
Do it.
Where's Mamooli? T. Ray?
- They didn't make it. - What the hell happened?
He killed them. You killed them!
- I didn't kill anybody. There's somethin' on this ship. [ Hanover ] Bullshit!
No! It's not bullshit, Mr Hanover. There are things on this ship!
You two know each other.
- Please stand clear of the door. - T. Ray was my... you killed him,
Didn't you? You killed him, Didn't you? Didn't you?
[ Grunt ]
- I heard you the first time. - Stand down, you!
And you, tell me what happened.
The ship's infested. The bloody thing are everywhere.
- Infested with what? - I don't know! How do I know?
Never seen anything like it before.
Your turn! [ Exhales ] [ Growling, Crashing ]
[ Growling, Roaring ] [ Operator Continues ]
[ Roaring Ends Abruptly ] Second level.
Third level, fourth level, fifth level.
Sixth level.
[ Growling Resumes ] [ Canton Yells ]
[ Roaring Stops ] [ Trillian Gasping ]
What the hell is that?
Girl for me.
Hey, guys, you don't mind if we get off this thing now, do you?
That's a good idea.
[ Growling ]
Hang on!
[ Screaming ]
[ Elevator Bell Dings ]
[ Machine voice ] This elevator is out of service.
[ All Shrieking, Yelling ]
- What is that? - What the bloody hell is going on.
You back off, Finnegan.
[ Metal Creaking ]
Holy shit. Look at that.
Now what?
[ Rumbling, Creaking ]
Hey!
[ Rumbling Stops ]
[ Body Parts Squishing ]
[ Muttering ] Come on.
Shit! [ Yelling, Roaring ]
Let's move!
[ Loud Wail Ends Abruptly ]
Chick with the muscles.
Come on. There's nowhere to hide.
Chick with the muscles?
[ Thunder, Lightning Crashing ]
[ Canton ] It was almost as if the ship had struck a reef or something.
It came to a sudden, violent stop.
And then suddenly they were everywhere. Th-The passengers all panicked.
[ Captain ] Well that was so fast. There was no time to do anything.
Couldn't even use the lifeboats.
Trouble is gentlemen, nobody knows we're in trouble. Couldn't send an SOS.
Well, then, mon capitaine. I think the
first order of business should be to call for help. Don't you?
- Yeah, man, call in the Marines. - Yeah, let's do it now.
[ Captain ] Look, you don't seem to understand.
- Something has jammed the systems. - Not something.
Someone.
Who are you?
My name is Simon Canton. I own this ship.
Hanover had a connection on this ship,
somebody to knock out all the communications.
You two know each other.
- It was you. - What?
Very quick, Mr Finnegan.
- Is this true, Canton? - [ Finnegan ] How do we fix it?
[ Gun cocking ]
I said, how do we fix it?
Answer him.
Answer him, you son of a bitch! [ Muttering ]
All the systems are melted at the core.
There's not going to be any calls for help.
[ Gasping ]
- For God's sake, man, why? - Damn it!
This was supposed to be your life's work, I thought.
Ships gotta be worth, what? Couple of hundred million.
Four hundred eighty-seven point six million dollars.
The insurance.
That's what the torpedoes are for.
You loot the ship, and then you sink it for the insurance.
I spent my whole life, my entire fortune, building this ship.
I'll be damned if I'm gonna lose it to a bunch of pencil-necked bankers.
Lose it! You greedy bastard. What are you talking about?
The ship was up and running at full capacity.
I know captain. But, the problem is, the cost of keeping it operating
is a hell of a lot more than we're ever gonna take in.
You mean, we're all gonna die because you screwed up on the math?
I simply misjudged the market.
What about the passengers? Were they insured?
I may be a crook, but I'm not a savage.
The passengers, the crew and I would have been safely evacuated on the lifeboats.
Don't you get self-righteous with me, Mr. Finnegan. I know all about you.
You despicable, lousy bastard! [ Grunting ]
- You sold us out to the bloody insurance! - All right, knock it off!
Do you realize how many innocent people you've killed on this ship?
- Hey, hey, break this up! - Innocent passengers!
- [ Hanover ] That's enough! - [ Canton ] Nobody was gonna get hurt!
- What? - I like it.
Thanks.
[ Metallic Rumbling ]
[ Soft Growling ]
[ Pipes Clanging, Wailing Sound ]
[ Screaming ] [ Roaring ]
[ Screaming ]
[ Grunting ]
[ Roaring ]
Oh, Jesus Christ! [ Screaming ]
Good God, it's Billy! [ Moaning ]
[ Moaning Continues ]
Help me.
Jesus no! no!
[ screaming and gunfire ]
- Over here now! - Right here! Right here!
Jesus Christ. These things are every where.
How do you turn this damned thing on?
[ Yelling ]
[ Distant Gunfire ] [ Panting ]
Jeez Louise. Lady, give a guy a heart attack, why don't you?
[ Distant Wailing ] [ Trillian Gasps ]
[ Hanover ] Over this way! Go! Go!
What are these things?
Really unfriendly.
So, um... you got a boat waiting outside. Is that right?
- Yeah. - Okay. Let's make a deal here.
You get me to your boat, and, uh...
And I can have whatever I want.
Yeah, whatever you want.
Can you get me a cold beer?
Funny.
[ Roaring ] [ Screaming ]
[ Growling ]
[ Steam Hissing ] [ Growling ]
[ Snarling ]
[ Low Growling ]
[ Roaring ] [ Gasps ]
[ Grunts ] [ Roaring ]
[ Gunshot ] [ Roaring ]
[ Screams, Pants ]
Time to go!
[ Distant Wailing ]
- I owe you one. - Damn right, you do.
[ Both Panting ]
Get me off this boat alive and we'll call it even. Deal?
Deal.
Please tell me you're a man of your word.
Absolutely.
[ panting continues ]
[ Gasping ]
[ Grunting, Screaming ]
[ Growling ] Canton, get me... Aah!
[ Screaming ]
Hang on.
Come on! Pull! [ Captain Screaming ]
[ Growling ]
Eat this, you wankers!
[ Wailing Recedes ]
What the hell are these god-damned things?
I'm beginning to fear that our friends here...
maybe... some kind of strange Archaea Ottoia family.
[ Pantucci ] Huh, the Ottoia family. And to think, I was starting to worry.
At 4,000 feet...
The Ottoia are about as long as a pencil...
with bodies about the size of a golf ball.
But those at 20,000 feet...
have been found to eat full-grown sharks.
At thirty or forty thousand feet...
well, you do the math.
This, uh... this is not good.
Are we talkin' some kind of mutated sea monsters here?
Who gives a shit what they are? Just tell us how to kill these, mother fuckers.
The Ottoia are very crafty.
[ Canton ] They hide in burrows...
and catch their victims with spiny tentacles,
and then they-they crush them between massive jaws.
Yeah, and then they eat you, right?
No. They drink you.
They drink you alive,
sucking all the fluids out of a body before excreting the skeletal remains.
All right. That's it, lessons over. Here's the plan.
Hey! I'm still givin' the orders around here, mister!
You stay here and give all the orders you want.
I'm gettin' back up to my boat, cuttin' it loose and gettin' the hell outta here.
Yeah, man. I second that motion.
- Mind if I tag a long? - Feel free.
[ Finnegan ] Which way now?
At the end of this passageway, there should be an under-pass on the port side...
- that'll take us to the upper levels. - The starboard.
I've got the blue prints to the entire ship right here.
Who do you think gave you those blueprints?
I ask you, man, could it get any worse?
[ Power Surging Sound ]
[ Finnegan ] Thanks, Joey.
I can't get that song out of my head.
They must have ripped a hole right through the hull. That's how they got in.
The power of these things, it's... it's awesome.
- I'm glad you're so impressed. - Shit!
- There's no way out through this door. - It's buckled right to the frame.
- We can't go back the way we came. - Okay, Canton, it's your ship.
Any ideas?
There are more hatchways and stairwells on the other side of this wall.
The only way out of here, is down those steps.
[ Beeps ]
- He's right. - How far?
[ Beeps ] [ Sighs ] It's 20 metres.
Somebody's gonna have to go down there and check.
I volunteer to wait here.
- Me too. - No way.
I'll go.
But you're comin' with me.
- Good luck. - And what are we laughing at?
If we make it through, I'll fire two rounds.
That means it's safe to come on through. Okay?
Okay.
Hey! It's mine.
Let's give the lady a real gun, shall we?
You know how to use that?
Yeah. If something comes at me, I'll just pull the trigger till it goes away.
Careful with that. It's got a hell of a kick.
I can handle it.
Well, if we're going for a swim...
I think it's your turn to carry the parts.
This is turnin' out to be one hell of a day.
[ Gasping, choking ]
- Come on. - Up.
What the hell is taking them?
You know, a... I don't mean to sound like a pussy...
but, this shit is starting to freak me out, man.
[Pantucci] Can you just get asthma?
Or do you have to be born with it?
[ Gasps ] [ Thundering Explosion ]
Uh-oh.
Oh, my God! [ Roaring ]
[ Wailing, Pounding ]
Jump!
Fuck! [ Wailing ]
[ Panting ] [ Pounding ]
[ Wailing ]
Come on, you son of a bitch! Come on! Come on!
[ Gun Rattling, Pantucci Panting ]
[ Roaring ]
[ Screaming ]
[ Yelling, shrieking ]
Oh! Aah! I'm outta here! I'm outta here!
[ Wailing ]
[ Screaming ]
[ Moaning, Shrieking ]
[ Beeping ]
[ Gasping ]
Come on, buddy. There you go.
[ Gasping ]
- Where's Mason? - It got him.
- Shit! Not Mason! - Grabbed him.
[ Mulligan ] No way this is happening!
This isn't bloody happening!
- Who's next. - Now, where do we go?
There are more elevators through that hatchway over there.
Fuck elevators.
I ain't goin' up in no more elevators, man.
I agree with these gentlemen.
How much longer before we can expect a rescue?
I'm not waitin' on any rescue party, Finnegan.
We checked in Just before sunset.
It'll be another 24 hours before they start searching for us.
Wh... what Are you saying they're not even gonna start
looking for this ship for another day or two?
Yeah, a... bit late by then, folks.
We got creepy crawlies swarming all over the place killing us off left and right.
Makes for a bit of a tight jam, don't you think?
I say we stay right here!
- Are you insane? - No. No, man. He's right.
There's plenty of food here. We can hold out until they rescue us.
They're right. This is the galley for the crew.
It was built to be almost entirely airtight in case of fire.
With these hatches closed, there's no way those things can get in here.
You wanna wind up in jail, Mulligan?
Better that, than in the belly of one of those things.
I don't care what you do, but I'm gonna keep on goin'. It's our only chance.
Back off! They are wiping us out, one at a time.
I say we make a stand. Right here, right now.
The whole damn ship's infested, Finnegan.
We're not gonna make it back to the boat anyway.
I'm not stayin' down here, and that's a fact.
- Now, back off that hatch. - I'll do it.
I'll do it. I swear to God, I'll kill you.
- I'm not mucking about here. - Whoa, whoa.
- Don't get hasty, man. - We're not staying here, Mulligan!
I say we are! [ Weapons cocking ]
Last stand, hey? We'll kick ass and take names.
You back off right now, soldier...
before I put you down.
[ Finnegan ] I once saw a guy put a fish in a bottle...
and then he corked it and sealed it tight...
and threw it to a baby octopus.
Now, the octopus,
he felt his way all around that bottle...
and in less than two minutes,
he got the cork off, slid inside...
and ate the fish.
And the moral of this story is?
We're the fish.
[ Trillian ] Listen...
the ship's already starting to sink. What if they don't get here in time?
- I-I don't want to drown. - Yeah.
Look, Mulligan, you can do whatever you want,
but I am gonna get my ass to the surface,
pray to God that my boat is still there...
and those things aren't crawlin' all over it...
and then I am gonna bail the hell outta here.
[ Panting ]
What?
What are you looking at?
[ Yelling ]
[ Rapid Gunfire ]
[ Roaring ]
[ Shrieking ]
[ Chuckles ]
You want some? You're nothin'!
[ Panting ]
[ Roaring ]
[ Growling ] [ Gasping ]
You see that? Did you see that?
[ Canton Whimpering ] [ Hanover ] Shit!
They're closin' the damn hatches, man! They're closin' the hatches!
[ Growling ] [ Trillian Shrieking ]
[ Electrical Shorting Sound ]
They're herding us!
They're forcin' us to go where they want us to go.
Wait, wait. Now you're tellin' me these things can think?
They're pushing us toward the bow of the ship.
What the hell is at the bow of the ship?
- Which way. - This just takes us back into the holes.
That's the way up, through there.
[ Panting ]
- Are you comin', or what? - Yeah.
I'm right behind you, really. [ Panting ]
[ Steam hissing ]
What the hell is this?
Looks like some kind of feeding ground.
Looks like a dead end to me.
Where's Canton?
[ Metallic Groaning ]
[ Groaning Intensifies ]
Now what?
[ Growling ]
Oh, my God. They're breaking through the hull.
[ Roaring ] [ Splashing water]
Go! Go! Go!
Everybody out. Go, go, go.
What is this?
[ Finnegan ] Canton!
Open up, Canton!
Open up, you bastard.
Open the door!
[ Screaming ]
[ Wailing ]
Do you hear that? They're comin', man!
They're comin'! [ Screams ] [ Grunts ]
- Son of a bitch! - I'm sorry!
Where's my gun? Where's my gun?
[ Water Gurgling ]
Hey, give me one of those!
[ Grunts ] You idiot!
[ Beeping ] Well, you didn't tell me to do that.
[ Water Splashes ] You didn't tell me to do that.
[ Growling ]
[ Screaming ]
- Son of a bitch! - Hey!
No, no, no, no! What are you doing? Come on!
I lost the backpack! It's got the engine parts to my boat!
We're not goin' anywhere without 'em!
Damn! [ Water Rushing ]
Oh, shit. [ Trillian Gasps ]
They're catchin' up!
They're catchin' up! We gotta slow them down.
The only way to slow them down, is to feed them.
Feed them!
All I got is a wet stick of gum and a breath mint!
Okay! All right!
What do we feed 'em? What are we gonna feed 'em?
[ Gunshot ]
[ Screaming ] [ Roaring ]
[ Gasps ] Oh, my God! It's gonna sink!
[ Chuckles ] It's going to sink.
[ Thunder crashes ] An island!
Hey! Hey, did you see that?
Yeah, I see it! We gotta get to it! Come on!
- That heap of junk is your boat? - You got a better one?
[ Laughing ] Wait a minute.
What if those god-damn things are crawling inside it?
We'll have to take our chances!
Can your boat make it to that island, without the engine parts?
Not a chance in hell.
Then what are we doing?
Trust me! I got a plan!
[ Electrical Buzzing ]
[ Gasping, groaning ]
[ Panting ]
[ Screams ]
[ Grunting ]
[ Snarling ]
Don't say I never gave you nothin'.
You asshole!
[ Growling ]
[ Trigger clicks ]
[ Growling ]
[ Screaming ]
- And find the keys! - Yeah! Yeah!
Make sure it's got gas.
[ Thunder crashes ] [ Grunts ]
Okay, okay.
The key's gotta be around here somewhere.
[ Beeping ]
[ Crashing Sound ]
Did you miss me?
Quit screwing around!
Get to the engine room and get me any power you can, fast.
Not even a, "Joey, I'm glad to see you?"
"Joey, what happened to your leg"?
Joey, you wanna be the appetizer or the entrée?
Right, right, right.
I'm on it. Give me the parts.
[ Mutters ] I lost them...
[ Pantucci mocks muttering ]
I lost 'em!
- You what? - I lost 'em, okay? I lost 'em!
Go with the flow will you, Joey? I got a plan.
Plan my ass! Without those parts, this thing
ain't gonna go more than about a city block!
Well, that's all I'm gonna need. Now get movin', will you?
Leila?
I don't think she made it.
Right.
I'll, uh... I'll go see what I can do.
[ Beeping ]
And kaboom.
- That ought to do it. - All set.
But, we only got enough fuel for maybe 5, 6 minutes max.
Then she's runnin' on fumes.
Here goes nothing.
Come on! Come on! Come on! [ Engine sputters ]
Come on! Come on! Come on!
[ Panting ]
Yes! Yes! Yes! Come on baby.
Come on! Come on! Come on! Come on! Come on! Come on!
[ Engine sputters ] Damn!
- Listen, you have to be... - Gentle. I know! I know!
Come on! Come on! Come on! Come on! Come on! Come on!
- Yes! - Atta girl.
[ Engine idling ]
Bye-bye, baby.
Come on, man. Let's book.
Hello. [ Gasps ]
Shit!
I'll bet. It's nice to see you again too.
Ah-ha-ha! No!
Now, give me that key. [ Thunder crashes ]
- I'll... I'll take you with me. - Yeah, what about the others?
Fuck 'em. They have to go down with the ship. That's how it works.
Now, give me that key.
Now!
Give me that key. [ Grunts ]
[ Shouts ]
[ Trillian Screams ]
Son of a bitch!
Get in there and cut the engines.
Wait! Wait! Are you crazy?
Just cut the engines, Tucc! Do it now!
Wait! Wait!
Shit!
Give me that key, you bitch!
[ Grunts ]
God-damn it!
[ Screams ]
[ Panting ]
I've never actually killed anybody before.
[ Scoffs ] Not on purpose that is.
Here. Take this.
Now... just, walk away and let me go.
[ Chuckles ] I don't think so.
No witnesses allowed.
I don't think this'll be quick, but... it'll be interesting.
No! No!
[ Shooting resumes ] [ Canton screaming]
[ Metallic groaning, crumbling ]
[ Gasps, crashing ]
Oh, now what?
[ Metallic creaking ]
[ Hysterical wailing ]
[ Roaring ]
[ Gasping ]
[ Fierce roaring ]
[ Roaring continues ]
Now there's somethin' you don't see every day.
- Time to go. - Good idea.
[ Screams ] [ Grunts ]
[ Growling ]
[ Screaming ]
Finnegan!
Aah!
[ Grunting ]
[ Growling, roaring ]
What are you lookin' at?
[ Weapon unsheathing ]
[ Shrieking ]
[ Grunting ]
Look out!
[ Weapon cocking ]
Get to the cargo bay! Go! Go!
[ Roaring ]
Pantucci! Come on!
Let's get the hell outta here...
[ Shrieking resumes ]
[ Gasps ]
God. Finnegan, where are you?
[ Thunder crashing ]
[ Screams ]
Jesus, lady. Watch it will ya!
Shit. I'm sorry. Thank God you're alive.
Damn straight I am. Let's keep it that way, huh?
[ Thunder rumbling ]
[ Engine idling ] [ Canton chuckles ]
No!
[ Canton screams ]
[ Moaning ]
[ Groaning continues ]
Well, that's a hell of a Jump. Let's get up some speed.
Hang on.
Whoa!
Oh, shit!
Go, Finnegan! Faster! Faster!
[ Roaring, snarling ]
Cock it!
[ Shrieking ]
[ Grunting ] [ Beeping ]
[ Beeping continues ]
[ Canton groaning ]
[ Screams ]
[ Finnegan grunting ]
We gotta get outta here! This thing's gonna blow!
Whoa!
[ Snarling ]
Oh shit!
Cock it! [ Cocking ]
[ Shrieking ]
[ Both cheer ] Whoo-hoo!
[ Groaning ]
[ Beeping ]
[ Grunts ] [ Rapid beeping ]
[ Panicked groaning ]
Hang on!
[ Shrieking ]
Shot to shit.
Where are you when I need you, Joey?
Hey, I found a souvenir.
Well, I guess we're stuck on this island.
[ Surf crashing ]
Well, I guess we're stuck on this island.
Better than a cold beer, huh?
Finnegan!
Hey, guys!
Joey!
- Joey! - Are you all right?
Watch the leg!
- Watch the leg! - I thought you said he was dead.
I thought he was dead!
It... It almost had me, man.
It came crashin' right through the wind-shield.
I ran out the hatch. The thing was snappin' at my ass.
[ Pantucci gasps ]
I dove overboard, swam like hell.
Next thing I know, kabloowie.
And your damn surfboard almost cut me in half, man.
[ Laughing ]
Hey, was it the water in my eyes, or...
did I just see a little lip action between you two?
Joey...
You know, I could always go for a stroll down the beach or...
- Joey. - go for a little swim.
Although, I gotta tell ya, if I never get back in that damn water...
[ Both ] Joey!
Okay, cool. I'll stick around. You don't have to beg me.
This looks like a... nice enough place.
[ Beastly roaring ]
[ Snarling ]
[ Roaring continues ]
[ Finnegan ] Now what?